We make choices every day--what time to get up, whether we are getting up, what to wear, what to say to the nimrod in the elevator who says "great weather, huh?" Life is about choices. We've been taken to task a number of times for this, but we really believe it's simple physics: if we choose negative, cynical, spiteful and angry, that's exactly what we'll get back. If you're expecting a bag of crap, there's no way short of a miracle you'll get butter pecan ice cream. Ain't gonna happen. And it is a Choice. What's this got to do with relationships? Plenty. If we expect to be treated fairly, gently, with respect, we will reasonably hope to get that back. If we expect abuse, disregard, sarcasm etc. there's no way short of a miracle we'll get... You get the idea. The reason this comes up today is that certain family members have once again proven that their default mode is negative, fearful, cynical. It's too bad. We want to tell them that those aren't killer alien mutants under the bed; they're only dust bunnies, so go back to sleep for Pete's sake. Oh, and great weather, huh?