Sunday, August 31, 2008
Friday, August 29, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
It's said that everyone has a book in them. We should all take the time to write 100 words a day,only half a page, about something--or nothing--and guess what? Even with editing, compiling, rewrites and 'killing your darlings', after a year you'll have at least 30,000 words--nearly the size of the average memoir. Why do this? If it never sees the light of day--and Lord knows most shouldn't--your life story thus far is of interest to your spouse & family. Dad's been gone almost two years now, and we wish we'd followed through with our stated desire that he write down where he'd been, what he did, who he met, what his dreams had been and how he felt about dying--and living. It's not vanity or bravado; it's important that everyone share their story.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
Our webmaster (mistress?) has released the Caffection website to us in phantom form so we can tweak, edit, peruse and critique it. The site is a beautiful piece of cyber-art, and will be a fine resource for a lot of people, we hope.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Friday, August 22, 2008
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Monday, August 18, 2008
Weekly book review day, and today we have a very important edition that, caffected or not, couples, singles, anyone interested in anyone else should read. The Four Things That Matter Most, by Ira Byock M.D. is an excellent read no matter what, but if what matters to you and those around you is important, then this book is, too. Here are the four things: Please forgive me; I forgive you; Thank you; I love you. Think about it, is there anything else important we need to know about getting along with other people, and showing them we care, we share, we hear and we love? No, there isn't, and we would all do well to remember those four simple phrases as we go through our day. Acknowledge our humanity; recognize shared frailty; exercise simple gratitude, and say how you really feel about whoever it is you encounter. This is not easy sometimes, as first impulses often reveal a side of ourselves we'd rather not see. But these four fragments can assist us in rising above the petty, self-righteous reactions we sometimes dredge up. It's a great read, and we recommend it.
The Four Things That Matter Most ©2004 Ira Byock Free Press http://www.thefourthings.org/excerpt.htm
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Here's an anecdote from the world of positive spin that has applications for all of us: how to use different phrases & verbiage to change perceptions, and to alter people's understanding of the possible. At Disneyland, if you ask "what time does the park close?", you'll get this answer from one Mickey's well-trained Disney-preneurs: "Disneyland is open till 9 o'clock tonight!"
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Friday, August 15, 2008
The journey of life sends us down, or up, many paths. Narrow, winding, uphill, straight, downhill, and everything in-between. Once in a while we’re led to a cliff, it’s here we make our life decisions. Though we’ve all experienced them, until we’re aware that we’re in total control of our decisions, we fail to take full advantage of our own life direction. The decision cliff can be a positive or negative experience. Often when you’re at the decision cliff, your life is filled with a sense of excitement, mixed with anxiety and apprehension. We believe you’re reading this because your path has led you here. At this time in your life, you’ve reached a decision cliff, causing you to stretch and grow into a new and better you.
Your best friend is always available to you when you're in a caffected relationship. Take advantage of the insights they offer, together you'll build a great life that provides the rich rewards of caffection.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
E-mail has taken over the world, but it is such a nice thing to receive a card in the snail mail box from your best pal. Maybe because e-mail is how we communicate. Things in the box outside the house are typically bills, which arrive with some regularity, so of little consequence. But a card from someone is very special. And they seem to show up at the best times, too. I (Byron) got one today from (Mariah), and it couldn't have come at a better time. I'm not sure when the snail received it, but the fellow inched up to the house on a day when I was feeling particularly burdened with some silly thing like a mortgage on a rental property, so trifling, like I said. So if you don't mind, indulge me for one moment. You see, Mariah checks the blog before she leaves work for the day, so... Thank you dear one. I loved the card, and you are indeed the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love you with all my heart, and that's pretty much forever.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
We have a ritual we try to remember every morning, like brushing teeth, and turning on the coffee pot. We focus on what we're passionate about--creating a resource for married best friends--caffection. We recite it by rote, and brand it into our memory. Part of that ritual mentions the trust we have that people will be there for us, helping us along, getting us where we need to be. Native Americans had an expression--"don't push the river, it runs all by itself". With our morning rite we let the river run, knowing that regardless what the issue is--good or bad--if we relax and allow things to work out, they typically do, and usually far better than they would have with our frantic urging.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Monday, August 11, 2008
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Living large is coming. We wrote previously of a paradigm shift in our culture, and it's as real as the headlines of doom and gloom. The difference is, this change in the weather is for a very good thing. Living small has its advantages: a perception of safety; blending in; strength in numbers. But living small is a lot like dying a little every day; it's avoiding the big WHY because we're afraid.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
While entering books on the Caffection Corner Amazon Market last night we saw the vast amount of information we've taken advantage of. Here at Caffection: Married To My Best Friend Blog we've discussed at length the importance of affirming each other. One component of that is the bonding you'll find when you focus on a mutual goal. As with all successful teams, focusing on a goal, your shared vision, is key. Ours is affirming and supporting positive, healthy, caffected 'marriages'. Tell us about your shared vision here.
Friday, August 8, 2008
...friends think you're pretty weird, and their jealousy just sizzles. We've dealt with some strange looks, interesting comments and the odd whisper. It isn't easy at times to be the romantic duo, and display our affection for each other in public. We were going to fly to Beijing and take in the Olympics, but there was a problem; the Chinese people frown on PDAs, not Personal Digital Assistants--Public Displays of Affection, and since we do those a lot, we figured it wasn't worth an international incident, so we're staying home.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Google likes us, apparently. Caffection is slowly making its way up the SE charts, and before long it will be a living, breathing, real thing. Well, hyperbole aside, Caffection will enter the marketplace of ideas very soon.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Even with gas prices as high as they are it's nice to fantasize about a luxury trip, a once in a lifetime journey to an exotic island, or land at the end of the world. We lived that fantasy for almost three years, and we can attest that once you've had a getaway like ours there's no denying the urge to do it all over again. Kauai is the westernmost of the habitable Hawaiian islands, the most remote group of islands in the world. We would occasionally drive to Polihale beach on the western shore of the island and look west. From where we stood the nearest land mass was Japan, three thousand miles away. It was a getaway like no other.
Monday, August 4, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
What we expect is what we get. Whatever we focus on expands, until it becomes our reality. These sound like hollow words, just another set of euphemistic fluff that no one really believes but sound good, and look good on the printed page. But think about the last time you expected to have a good time at a party, or at the movies. We're you surprised? What about the last time you dreaded facing a co-worker, or a colleague who caused you a problem? Going in, if you expected confrontation, what did you get?
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Friday, August 1, 2008
There's no contradiction in being romantic best friends. This is not a misprint. Lovers, caffected married people, have the elite status of having it all. If there's a better definition of wealth, we're not sure what it is. This wealthy status extends to every aspect of a relationship, including so-called end of life issues. For caffected couples there can be no sadder event than a death of one member of the relationship. When a loved one passes on there are so many items needing attention that, regardless of how diligent we are beforehand, there always seems to be something missed, some detail left out of the planning.